Wednesday, 5 September 2012

Babies & Having a Family - for Single People!

Now you may like or dislike this depending on your current situation.  I made this yesterday when I was still happy w/ my relationship & looking forward to having a family & 'creating' babies hehe!  But today, I don't know.  I've told a friend of mine that if I had to do my life over I would prioritize getting married & having kids...having a family.  We both agreed that being single & financially stable kinda feels like you don't have anything at all in life (we are both female).  But she pointed out that, well, maybe we just never wanted to marry the men we were w/ in the past.  And I think that is kinda true...or simply true.  I mean, up until last year I never wanted to get married & I hated kids/babies.  I was w/ a douche bag & I NEVER would want to marry him because in the back of my mind I feel like someday I might finally 'get over him' & 'fall out of love' then it would be good not to be trapped in a marriage!  And I never liked kids.  They are so annoying & noisy & you cannot tell them to behave or what, they wouldn't understand anyway.  I deliberately avoid restaurants w/ kids & avoid sitting beside families w/ kids as I don't want to get annoyed or disturbed.  I am annoyed when a co-worker brings her kid to work & I HAVE to pretend along w/ others that her kid is cute & I'm so fond of him/her....aaaargh!  And what is there to like about babies???  They are all small & bald & all look alike & they all smell like vomit!!!  So that was what I was just last year.  The only reason I ever thought about having kids or getting pregnant is the fact that I'm getting older (over 30) & someday I might 'want' to have kids but it could be too late already then I would have regrets.  But I always thought about my mum who always hated us (my dad, my brother, & me).  She just always wants to be alone.  I thought I would never want to be her who probably just had a family because it was the thing to do but never really actually liked us!  Anyway I'm going too far from the topic so now I'm w/ this awesome guy & suddenly I so want to get married & get pregnant.  So, I don't know.  But we just had a fight last night & I'm having 2nd thoughts so now this pic is not that appealing to me as it was yesterday.  I mean, would I just prefer to be alone forever since I can't find someone I'm compatible w/?  Or maybe I will just be a burden to him & to our future kids.  I remember a friend of mine who's older than me & still single (female again) that she said she feels like she cannot get married because she has such an awful personality & no one would want to live w/ her & that I may not see that now coz I'm not living w/ her.  Now I feel the same way, would I prefer to be alone than be a burden to other people???  I don't know...where has this post gone...?

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